Friday, March 13, 2009

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone!

Yep, I fell off my rocker completely and have now broken into song!

Nah, actually the song lyric just popped into my head because of something that happened here at work, but it just so happens to fit with what I wanted to write about today anyway. Coincidence? I think not.

What happened at work is actually quite trivial, in the grand scheme of things, but it did brighten my day. Melanie and I played a nice game of Musical Monitors, where we exchanged my "dinosaur," as she called it, for a much newer, brighter and bigger flat screen monitor. I have SO much more space on my desk now, and the picture really is much better. Thanks Mel!

On to what I wanted to write about today anyway...

As you may know, my word for the year is CLARITY. These past few weeks, I haven't been feeling it all that much. Ok, to be honest, not really feeling it *at all*. Feeling a bit down about the progress that I haven't been making on the health aspect of things. Feeling shaky on the financial aspect, since we made headway but still had a ways to go. Feeling really low on my efforts to be a better wife and homemaker. And of course, there has been no clarity on my situation at work since December.

But this morning, for the first time in quite a while, I could feel the CLARITY coming back into my life. It was such a freeing realization to make, and it has put me in a good mood this morning.

So, how am I feeling the CLARITY?
  • Today is Day 5 of following the South Beach Diet (again). Some of you may know that I "fired" my nutritionist several weeks ago. Our personalities were never that much of a match right from the get-go, and I finally reached a point where enough was ENOUGH. Let's be honest here - I *gained* weight, and a significant amount at that, while seeing her. Does that sound like a good situation to you? I made that decision knowing that I would need to pick up something, some kind of healthy eating plan, if I were to ever lose any weight. I decided that South Beach would be my method of choice for a couple of reasons: it had worked for me in the past, and once you get past the first two weeks, it isn't so much of a diet but more like eating the way we are *supposed* to be eating all the time anyway. So, here I am at Day 5 and I think I'm doing quite well. I did not suffer from the carb withdrawal nearly as bad as I have in the past. Even Shawn remarked last night that I have not been very bitchy at all :) Sure, I'm not perfect about this - I still use a sugared flavored creamer in my coffee - but I'm doing darn well, if I do say so myself! That creamer has been the only sugar or carb to pass my lips since I started this. As a side note, Day 1 was Monday - the day the merger was announced, and a day of great stress. So, bonus points for me! Definitely feeling CLARITY, headway and hopeful peace of mind on this one.
  • We have decided to pay off the remaining money we owe on our credit cards. It's not a trifling little amount, but it will bring us greater financial peace now and in the long run. It's part of our greater plan to increase our financial security in preparation for a possible job loss. I've also been running the numbers and have formulated a plan where we can dramatically increase our savings each month, in further preparation. I am very grateful that we are able to do this. It was through a series of unfortunate life circumstances which brought us the ability to do this, and so I am feeling very grateful, blessed and humbled by this. I am also very grateful to not be facing the life situations that those around me are looking at - kids in daycare, kids about to head off to college, kids about to get married. However, for all my gratitude, I am also feeling significant amounts of concern for those around me, so my feelings of gratitude and blessedness are bittersweet. Still, being able to make financial progress is giving me an awesome feeling of CLARITY. Also, if you know me, you know that I like to (need to!) have a PLAN. So even though I have no idea if I will have a job in 1 month, 6 months, 1 year - I have a PLAN. And that makes the situation feel so much more under control and easier to face. (Yes, I am aware that the last time we had our credit card debt paid off, we ended up paying something like $2500 for a sick cat, and several hundred or thousands of dollars when we moved - all of which sent us right back onto the credit card roller coaster. I am hoping and praying that I did not jinx us to a similar fate by broadcasting our current news to the world.)
  • There hasn't been all that much to report on CLARITY in the home, but I'm optimistic at the moment. I'm hopeful that my improved mood and sense of clarity in other areas will allow me the freedom and energy to focus more on my home in order to bring it into order. I'm not the greatest housekeeper ever, and I come by that very honestly. It has always been a source of trouble for me, and it does bother me deeply that I am surrounded by such clutter and mess. So, I was thinking this morning that even though next week promises to be busy as usual, I am confident that I can carve out 15 to 30 minutes each evening in order to focus on cleaning up and restoring order to my home. I plan to focus on only one room each night, so as to not become overwhelmed. I'll let you know how it goes - you can all be the ones to help hold me accountable! I might not have any progress today to show for it, but just having a PLAN is giving me a feeling of CLARITY.

How about you? How are you progressing with your words for the year, or your resolutions for the new year? The first day of spring is next week - we'll have made it through roughly one-quarter of the year. Are you where you want to be with your goals? If not, consider this: Spring is a season of renewal and rebirth. Maybe you can take that opportunity to dust off your words and goals. Do a little mental spring cleaning. Get yourself back on the right path. I'm confident that you can do, because if I can do it - so can you!


Unhinged said...

No word for the year here....(or if there was one, I don't remember it already...heehee), but it does sound like you've got your ducks in a row. You go, girl.

As for me, I'm still on a George Clooney high after watching last night's episode of ER. :)

Anonymous said...

Good for you Laurel. I hope everything works out. I don't have a word just a commitment to take better care of myself and believe in myself. To try and keep the positive things in my life and rid myself of the negative.

Melb. said...

Nice post Laurel. Couple of things:
thing 1: The monitor...ask and ye shall receive :)
thing 2: It's funny you should talk about your word for the year because I mentioned mine on my blog today.
thing 3: It's always good to have a plan. I am all in favor of plans but just remember that not all things go according to plan. We plan - God laughs!
thing 4: I did NOT know that you fired your nutritionist but it did seem there was no love lost there. I am happy that you are progressing with the SBD.
thing 5: feeling a little bad about the "joke" I made earlier. I didn't know it was something that bothered you so I am apologizing again :)
thing 6: Are you sure you want me to be an accountability partner? You know I can be brutally honest ;)

Melb. said...

Oh and one other thing. THANKS ALOT...I'll be singing that STUPID song all day now :Þ

Anonymous said...

Have you read the flylady books, Laurel? I have to be organized, because I'm such a random/abstract personality, and she helped my challenge of organization. You can borrow her books at the library. Some stuff, I pretty much never tried, but the stuff I liked really helped.